Moving to the Country.
This time last year I was surrounded by boxes. We were in our old home desperately waiting to exchange. A couple of days later it all fell through. We were gutted. So I went slightly mad on fairy lights and covered the whole house in an attempt to lift my own spirits and hide the disaster zone that our half packed up house was. Thankfully a week later it was back on and in the new year we were off to the countryside. A new year, a new start, a new home.
The move to the countryside came about slightly earlier on in life than we had originally thought. We fell in love with something and before we knew it, our house had been sold. We had spent a lot of time and effort making that house our home and so much of it was perfect. We had always talked of being there for at least 5 years so moving after 3 initially felt too soon. I had always enjoyed living in London and always felt so lucky to have all that London has to offer on your doorstep. That being said once we started our family we had always talked about moving away, moving to a village and changing gear in life. Although the theory is always very different to actually doing it!
When we said we were planning on moving away from London and off to the countryside we were greeted by a mixed reaction, moving away from family when you have two small children was seen as a bit of a no no. “You don’t know anyone that lives round there already?” “You will have to drive everywhere!” Moving away and taking on a huge renovation project, were we crazy? Wouldn’t I miss being able to meet up with friends? I did worry that going off to meet up with friends would become a logistical nightmare. And meeting up for a quick drink wouldn’t happen any more. But in reality once we had had children this all changed anyway. I can’t remember the last time I had made last minute plans. Announcing at 5pm that I was off for drinks just wasn’t possible anymore. Diaries were always booked up weeks if not months in advance anyway.
Making a final decision and being happy with it was hard. It felt as if there was a lot riding on our decision. Our decision not only affected our lives now but also those of our children. Turning round and coming back wouldn’t be easy and in actual fact would be almost impossible. In the end it came down to what was best for my family. Where did I see them growing up, what did I want their experiences of life in early childhood to be? Sometimes making changes and taking risks is not an easy thing to do. We are more often than not creatures of comfort, routine and sticking to what we know. But sometimes taking risks, being bold and making a change can lead to something to great.
Something great has happened for us, we are truly happy here. Since we moved I have not had a single moment of regret. Don’t get me wrong, with the current state of the house and the list of jobs growing ever longer I have had many times where I could scream or would prefer to just hibernate. The house, if I have not already mentioned it, is a massive work in progress. It will be beautiful one day but just isn’t yet. But I have not missed our old home, I have not missed where we used to live. I have not once just wished we were back at our old home. And that surprises me. In many ways I thought I would long for our old home, I thought the girls would miss our old house but they don’t either. There are just too many positive things about living here that makes it a happy home for us.
Its the small things, seeing the stars in all their glory in the night’s sky. Watching the girls watch the birds outside through the windows. Driving through stunning countryside on a daily basis including the girls’ favourite “tree tunnels.” Putting our wellies on and heading outside together as a family on the weekend whatever the weather. We are outside a lot more, the girls are experiencing so much more of nature now. F couldn’t say a lot of words but could recognise and say acorn. She refuses to eat most foods but will happily eat any apple, berry from any tree or bush in the garden ( not always a good thing I know!). They both have no issue in getting their hands stuck in and getting muddy helping out outside. I still have moments of looking outside and looking at our surroundings where I almost have to pinch myself that this is real. The surroundings here are truly stunning.
I have had to push myself since moving here too. I have had to push myself out of my comfort zone and do things I would have preferred not to do before. I have in this past year spoken to more new people than I had probably in the entire three years in our old home. I am a shy person by nature but have been determined to get out there, meet new people and become part of the community. Which is how I came to find myself going to a dinner with 50 other women and not really knowing anyone there. This would have been my worst nightmare before and something I would have run a mile from. But instead I went for it. I have grown. I have been so overwhelmed by people’s friendliness and kindness since we have moved here. And I am truly grateful for that, as it has made a huge difference to our first year here.
Ok, there are frustrations. Getting stuck behind a tractor when already late is one. But the girls love being stuck behind a tractor and keep us entertained “riding along on a big blue tractor…” And that is as bad as a traffic jam generally gets! Driving in general is slightly more nerve racking. Especially attempting to get somewhere new and the satnav takes you down single track dirt roads, with pot holes the size of a small paddling pool and low and behold an oncoming van comes round the corner in front! My confidence has quickly grown and the girls have learnt that when mummy says she needs to concentrate, I really need to concentrate.
Everything is now a drive away which is an adjustment. There is no shop just on the corner to pop to if we run out of milk. And we still haven't quite found the perfect local cake shop or cafe where we can pop into when I am desperate for cake at any time of the day or night.
I am forever slightly muddy and my “nice “ shoes don’t stand a chance at the moment of being picked to be worn. Boots and wellies are the go to instead.
Phone signal is temperamental to say the least. But I have found two very good spots where I can stand to make a comprehensible phone call.
It’s dark! I mean very dark. Although this is wonderful for star gazing, there are times when I am making a trip to the bin and I get too close to the bushes and disturb the pigeons. I am very close to needing a change of underwear at those moments! And a trip to the wood shed at night is just not happening!
Then there is the long commute. Not for me, mine is from one end of the corridor to the other but my husband has a drastically increased journey time. But it is doable and he makes the most of his commute for working, catching up on Netflix and the occasional nap too.
The hardest thing is being further away from my family. I do wish I could see my family more. We really were spoilt before. A short walk to my sister and a short drive to my parents. We would see each other multiple times a week. This is not quite as easy now and this is the one thing that I am sad about. It just takes a bit more forward planning and effort. I want the girls to be close to their extended family. I know it is our decision that has effected this. I hope that it will get easier to see family and more of a routine will be found again to see each other more regularly.
All in all I have no regrets. We are so happy, all of us. Although this house is not perfect yet it is already very much our home. We already have so many happy memories here. And feel truly lucky when we look outside at our surroundings. So, sometimes you need to push yourself, take a leap of faith as great things can happen when you take risks. You learn so much more when you push yourself out of your comfort zone and this is good for our children to see us doing. I am looking forward to this house, our home evolving and changing. Just need to convince my family to move here too now.